A Tale of Two Funerals
Although we have changed the names and details to respect the privacy of the families involved the circumstances are real and actually occurred several years ago. Let's call the first family the Joneses and second family the Smiths.
Peter Jones was 76 years old with heart disease, and even though Peter knew he was very sick he refused to make final preparations. He resisted any discussion when his wife or adult children made any attempt to bring up the matter. He retorted “talking about death will make it seem like I am giving up”. Peter believed in the myth that talking about death makes one die suddenly – and refusing to talk about death allows people to live longer. Three months later Peter died, leaving his family to make some difficult decisions all at the worst possible time.
His wife and children were divided on whether to bury or cremate Peter, whether they should have a visitation, strong feelings were put forth by both sides. Emotions were running high amongst the entire family, a family that had always been close.
Ronald Smith was a 73 year old retired truck driver who after, being diagnosed with terminal cancer, he came to meet with us here at Oliver's to pre-plan both he and his wife Jeannie's funerals. Ron arranged so that his family could have a visitation if they wanted, then cremation, followed by a memorial service in our chapel, and a reception in our tea room. Ron selected the songs to be played, the honorary bearer's names, even the verse to appear on the memorial card. He then selected a cherry wood urn that reflected his hobby of wood-working, along with a custom image of his tractor trailer he drove for many years burned into the front of the urn.
Ron died a year and half after pre-arranging his funeral. We met with his wife and adult children to finalize the date and time of the visitation and service, we also reviewed the selections Ron had made in advance, when doing so the children would simply smile and say “Yup that's something Dad would have wanted – simple and to the point”.
Back to our first family, the Jones. Since Peter's funeral, we have met with two of his adult children and their spouses to plan their own funerals. They knew that they did not want their own families to go through what they had to.
We strongly encourage you to sit down with us and learn more about the many benefits and options of pre-planning your funeral arrangements – your family will thank you.
Our promise to you….
780.532.2929, www.oliversfuneralhome.com.
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